A friend sent me a Youtube video on China’s Got Talent about an orphan Mongolian boy singing a melancholy song, in remembrance of his mother. I watched the video many times and I was totally mesmerized by it.
Then I thought, watching on my computer is not good enough, I must be a witness to this heart-wrenching event.
So I sit down in an upright full lotus position on my meditation blanket and start my journey backwards in time.
I have to relax completely and surrender my inner being to the harmonic tune of the universe. I have to shut myself off to all physical sensations. Sight and sound are the initial impediments, the first obstacles to overcome.
I close my eyes and do some deep diaphragmatic breathing, slowly inhaling and exhaling through my nostrils and retaining the breadth after each motion in equal rhythmic cycles of 10 seconds each. There must be a point in focus, lest the monkey in the mind wanders. Mind eyes lay rest to the point 2 fingers below the navel and that is the center of the being. My sight is no more.
I still hear the earthly sound around me, the slow humming of air-condition of my neighbors’ houses, the chirping sound of a lizard, occasional voices of children and adults and the non-stop clatter of nearby TVs and videos. At first I listen intently and I can hear wonderful strange noises which I ignore in my daily life. I have learned not to give definitions to these noises and not to find the source of it. I just drift along and slowly these white noises too disappear, to be replaced only by the sound of my heartbeat palpitating.
The muscles within my body are still tense from the day’s toil. To relax them, I have to do the reverse. That is, to make them more tense and stretch them to a taut tension. Starting from my cervical region, I clench my teeth and exert full force onto the mandible and neck muscles. This is almost akin to a cobra in its defensive coiled position when it senses danger, whereby its cervical ribs are flattened giving it the appearance of a hood and its head sways forth from left to right and from right to left, waiting for an opportune moment to strike its opponent.
I grip both my fists until my nails groove my palms. I strained my pectoral muscles and my shoulder blades muscles and other muscles as well. The last region will be my perineum muscles, I grip inwards to close up the anal canal so that the coccyx, the last tailbone of the vertebra column, retracts slightly inwards.
When all the known muscles are taut with tension, I let go. Like a tightly coiled spring held on by a small bolt, it springs free, and the cathartic emotional and physical release within the body is like the opening of a flood gate on a dam when water is filled to its rim and it has to find relief from the pressure within.
The last stage is to deal with the intellectual mind. I always maintain that there is always a monkey lurking inside. To cut off sensations from without is not difficult but to cut off ‘thoughts’ from within is perhaps the most difficult task. The mind always resides in the future and in the past. It is rarely here and now. Every time I try to get a fix on its position, it moves away from this point. It gives me worries, out of which 98% or more do not materialize. It gives me rationalization and it gives me excuses.
To break free, the mind must be totally devoid of thoughts, just a blank space with no boundaries and an expanse without horizon. There are too many stimuli that bombard the mind every nano seconds that to maintain thoughtless for even some mere seconds need a long training process. So occasionally one has to ‘deceive’ it and do the opposite.
Using some auto-suggestion techniques, I chant no-thinking, no-thinking and no-thinking. For some time it works, then the monkey starts to disturb me again. It says onto me, ‘have you sent the letter out’, ‘have you called your client’, ‘have you done this or that’ and all sorts of thoughts creep in. Then I start to think hard. Think, think and think. Go over the events of the day, yesterday, yester month and yester year and think some more. Think about tomorrow, the day after tomorrow, next week and next month and think some more. Remember that the mind gets bore fast and it does not take long that I am in a clear state of mindless mind.
Now I am ready.
The astral body drifts out subtly, struggling to clear the gross body of flesh, like a young butterfly in its last stage of metamorphosis trying to shed its cocoon, to go into the world. And in an instant, I am out, defying gravity and there is no more restrain from time and space, to fly free without wings. The moment my thought focuses on a place, the instant I will be there, while the gross body remains silent and unmoving.
And I come upon the great auditorium where Wu DaMu, the 12 year old Mongolian boy sings his melancholic song in tribute to his deceased Mother.
Coming out post, Going back in time – Part 2 (SSM).